I’ve always had a thing about goodbyes. I cherish my childhood memories of my grandparents standing in the driveway outside their front door, waving goodbye to us as we drove up the hill and toward home (a good two-hour drive). Twisting my body around to make it last, I kept waving out the window as long as I could still see them.
My other set of grandparents’ stood on their front stoop waving as we pulled out of their half-moon driveway and started our eight-hour drive home. These images and feelings have stuck with me. Those memories feel like hugs through time.
As I got older, goodbyes became so frequent they didn’t come with the same connection or feeling. They were more practical. School day drop-offs, sleepovers, basketball practice. I was a teenager and goodbyes became routine.
Once I became a mom, meaningful goodbyes were back! As a little, P absolutely loved his doctor’s goodbyes. Dr. B always added a new one to the “See ya later” string. P dissolved into giggles every time.
“See you later alligator!”
“After a while crocodile!”
“See you soon you big baboon!”
P thought it was a hoot and dreamed up all kinds of (not so perfect) rhymes to say to Dr B at the next doctor visit. Every single one melted my heart.
Daycare goodbyes were brief. He just wanted to play already! School goodbyes would have continued that way, but I am committed to marking those everyday goodbyes. I leave P at school every day with a mantra thrown out the window. “Make good choices!” is a favorite because, can you really ever say it too much to a teenage boy? I’ll also say”Be kind!” “Remember how smart you are!” And “I know you can do this!” Sometimes I just shout ridiculous song lyrics or “I love you!” out the window. Love can sometimes be the most powerful when its in the routine.
As an adult, I mentioned to my parents how much I loved it when my grandparents came out to send us off. After I had P they started standing on their front step to say goodbye after a visit. And they still do it /every single time/ we come to visit. We live just 5 minutes away and we pop in *a lot* so they say goodbye *a lot*. In all seasons they put on their shoes and jackets to stand on the porch next to a jack-o-lantern or snowman or flower pot while we get in the car, put on our seat belts, get organized. They wait patiently until we back out and I roll down the windows to meet their waves with our own, and we shout “Goodbye!” and “Thank you!”
I’ll take this over money or fame or success. Every. Single. Time. As my dad says, as we walk to the car, “Life is good.”
Great memories!